"I Want From Love" by Unmana

after Mahmoud Darwish and Agha Shahid Ali

only the middle. Not the end,

of course not, that bitter dread.

Nor the beginning, even the excitement,

the incessant lust, the feeling of being

the only two people who ever felt this heady rush,

nor the slow learning of the other,

the delightful surprises, the bitter quarrels

and passionate making up. But the middle,

when our bodies are softer especially

around the middle, when the little narrow bed

is barely big enough for one,

and on the queen each night we cuddle

or hold hands before turning away and all

the urgent grasping has become

a relaxing, a letting go with the utter safety of knowing

you’ll be caught each time.

Unmana lives in Mumbai with their husband. Their novel Chikkamma Tours (Pvt.) Ltd is a deliciously bookish mystery that features India’s first fictional queer detective. Unmana’s short stories have been nominated for the Best of the Net and the Deodar Prize. They are on Twitter @Unmana and on Instagram @unmana_bombay.